Zelda Trash

catgirlbutthole:

marisatomay:

marisatomay:

marisatomay:

passports…should not expire

actually i have decided that passports shouldn’t exist at all

ALT

ALT

i love it here

Me when I’m about to do a terrorism but I am stopped by a cop asking for my passport

Originally posted by r4cs0

queermasculine:

actually a “butch stereotype” is one of the sexiest things a dyke can be

amaditalks:

desolationlesbian:

Pensions sound so fake as a zillennial. You work for one place for decades (already sounds fake) and then afterwards you leave and they just. keep paying you. the same amount of money. to do nothing. for the rest of your life. if i wasn’t already aware that this was something that readily and commonly existed during my grandparent’s days then it would sound like some kind of socialist pipe dream

401(k)s became available in 1978, and that signaled the death of pensions pretty much everywhere that they weren’t part of a union contract. Workers who still have pension plans today are almost universally unionized and that benefit has been a holdover from contracts of the past.

The thing about pensions is that they are deferred compensation. You take a slightly smaller salary than your role should have, and the difference is being invested and paid out to you in retirement. But when 401(k)s became a thing and companies dropped pension plans, compensation never rose enough to offset the difference, and employer contributions to 401(k) plans is lower than what they had to invest in pensions. They got to have their cake and eat it too, and workers got screwed.

And now we’re into a third generation of workers who don’t foresee actually having enough money to ever fully retire.

kobolde:

fred a freak according to hanky code

staticandlove:

marisatomay:

grown adults will get on the internet and say things like “why is this movie about the protagonist, the titular character?” just walk into the ocean i cannot help you

“That villain was so problematic”

Yeah it was their job

memewhore:

scenemo-spraycan:

Hey yeah in the midst of all the hype and the strikes, can we PLEASE fucking talk about this

shuttershocky:

These targeted ads are starting to get to me

monsieurenjlolras:

captoring:

pulchrabelle:

marcelock:

based moffat

by @hijynkz

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

oh sure barbie has a thousand different professional qualifications, but when was the last time she was allowed to kill a man? the patriarchy must end

i stand corrected

langernameohnebedeutung:

letopotato:

langernameohnebedeutung:

bonyassfish:

asparklethatisblue:

langernameohnebedeutung:

langernameohnebedeutung:

langernameohnebedeutung:

blue-corvid:

langernameohnebedeutung:

blue-corvid:

langernameohnebedeutung:

before cooking an egg, do you poke a little hole into the shell?

no, why would I?

No. (I know the reason people do it but I don’t do it.)

yes, obviously??

Yes (I don’t really know why, though)

other/press button!/don’t like eggs/vegan/slurp my eggs raw/vanilla extract/tags

Before I… crack them open?

….before you put them in here:

the water cup even comes with a little needle at the bottom for hole-poking purposes, see:

sorry i meant boil not cook

WHAT IS THAT

It’s an egg cooker!

It’s like a toaster and an electric kettle had a baby and …the baby boils eggs.

#is this specifically a German thing#because Germans tend to have Opinions about eggs#also the only people I know who actually know how to use an egg cup are German#teach me your ways - I still don’t understand why you’d use an egg cup. and I can’t imagine boiling eggs not in a pot on the stove

no egg cup:

egg cup:

#why is the wobble an issue you pick them up one at a time shell then and eat them like not whole but just#you hold them and bite them and eat then till there’s none left? why does this need extra tools

…at this point i’m sorry to introduce…the egg spoon.

Even better news about German egg related gadgets… the Eierköpfer (it also has a super long German name), for when you need a guillotine to open your egg neatly

No offence to Germany but why are you guys so fucking insane

nothing to see here. Just normal feelings about egg.

ALT

may i add this little stone egg in its little stone egg cup that’s been part of my grandma’s kitchen since probably forever

the little statue in honor of The Sunday Morning Egg

This is beautiful, thank you!

olivia-online:

I must not buy. Buying is the purse-killer. Buying is the little-dopamine that brings total bankruptcy. I will face my wishlist. I will permit the limited time sale to pass over me and through me. And when it has expired I will turn the inner eye to see its impulses. When the mania has gone there will be nothing. Only $ will remain.

echo-heo:

ALT